Last updated on January 20th, 2024

61 Best Coffee Quotes: Funny, Inspirational, Philosophical, & More!

I made a collection of the best coffee quotes because, for me, one of the most fun ways to appreciate this beverage is reading the amazing/inspiring/hilarious quotes about coffee that famous people have said. Ranging from inspirational Monday morning reflections to hilariously funny truths, I find these to be the perfect accompaniment to my morning brew.

And remember: a coffee quote is unlikely to tickle your brain if you require caffeine. So prepare some freshly made coffee and then come back to enjoy these!

funny coffee quotes to read with your morning brew

Also, bookmark this page so that you can always come back to it for some entertainment (or wisdom) whenever you have a coffee break!

**Best of Brewing is supported by our readers, and we sometimes earn a commission through the affiliate links on our website.**

Funny Coffee Quotes

I will get to some of the more philosophical and deep quotes later on, but I figured that starting a difficult morning with a funny coffee quote is a smoother transition into your busy day.

Plus, these funny quotes can make a fantastic coffee gift when you print them on the side of a coffee cup. So, whether you are sitting at home or in a local coffee shop, get ready to chuckle at these quotes!

A funny coffee quote by Henry Rollins

“What goes best with a cup of coffee? Another cup.”  – Henry Rollins

“I believe humans get a lot done, not because we’re smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee.”  – Flash Rosenberg

“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” – David Letterman

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“If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.”  –Abraham Lincoln

“Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline, the first often tasting like the second.” ―Edward Abbey

**Note: Hopefully, your black coffee does not taste like gasoline. But if you want to make your coffee less bitter, there are some simple ways to fix that! **

“Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?” ―Jean Kerr

cute and funny quotes about coffee like this excerpt from J.S. Bach's Coffee Cantata

“If I couldn’t, three times a day, be allowed to drink my little cup of coffee, in my anguish I will turn into a shriveled-up roast goat”

―Johann Sebastian Bach (German-English translation)

**Click here to watch a performance of Bach’s Cantata 211 Schweigt stille, plaudert nicht, also known as the coffee cantata.**

“No matter what historians claimed, BC really stood for “Before Coffee.”

Cherise Sinclair, Master of the Mountain

“Why, yes, I could start my day without coffee. But I like being able to remember things like how to say words and put on pants.”  ―Nanea Hoffman

“I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.” ―Lewis Black

“This left me alone to solve the coffee problem—a sort of catch-22, as in order to think straight I need caffeine, and in order to make that happen I need to think straight.”

―David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames


“Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.”
Alex Levine

Philosophical Quotes About Coffee

Now that you have had the first few sips of delicious coffee while reading some funny coffee quotes, it is time to get philosophical.

Coffee has a long tradition of syncing up with philosophical thinking and gatherings, and the European coffee houses of the 17th and 18th centuries helped foster Enlightenment thinking!

So let’s explore some of the best philosophical quotes about coffee!

philosophical quotes about coffee to give you something to ponder while you sip

“Coffee teaches us life lessons, like the importance of taking one sip at a time and pausing every now and then to reflect on life.” 

Mitali Meelan, Coffee and Ordinary Life

“Coffee makes us severe, and grave and philosophical.” Jonathan Swift

“I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, ’Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.’” 

Jim Carrey

“It is the folly of too many to mistake the echo of a London coffee-house for the voice of the kingdom.”  Jonathan Swift

“I have measured out my life with coffee spoons; I know the voices dying with a dying fall Beneath the music from a farther room. So how should I presume?”

T.S. Eliot, The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock

“Coffee is a lot more than just a drink; it’s something happening. Not as in hip, but like an event, a place to be, but not like a location, but like somewhere within yourself. It gives you time, but not actual hours or minutes, but a chance to be, like be yourself, and have a second cup”
― Gertrude Stein, Selected Writings

Dark But True Quotes On Coffee Drinking

dark coffee quotes that highlight our reliance on it

“It’s amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee.” 

Donna A. Favors

“Life is like coffee, the darker it gets, the more it energizes.”  Ankita Singhal

“I don’t know how people live without coffee, I really don’t.”  Martha Quinn

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“I would rather suffer from coffee than be senseless.”  Napoleon Bonaparte

“Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.”  Stephanie Piro

“The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportioned to the quantity of coffee he drinks.” 

Sir James Mackintosh

“I judge a restaurant by the bread and by the coffee.”  Burt Lancaster

“It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity.”

―Dave Barry

“Even bad coffee is better than no coffee at all.” ―David Lynch

“Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee?” ―Albert Camus

“I no longer drink nearly as much as I used to but, still, my motto is Sine Coffea nihil sum. Without coffee, I’m nothing.”
― Sarah Vowell

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Inspirational Coffee Quotes

inspirational coffee quotes

“Coffee connects us in so many ways – to each other, to our senses, and to the earth that supports the coffee trees.” ―Rohan Marley

Funny Inspirational Coffee Mug

MAUAG Funny Inspirational Coffee Mug With Coffee Quotes And Funny Sayings, Ceramic Cup, White, 11 Oz

“I don’t need an inspirational quote, what I need is a freaking cup of coffee.” – Unknown

“Coffee – it’s the lifeblood that fuels the dreams of champions!”  ―Mike Ditka

“I was taken by the power that savoring a simple cup of coffee can have to connect people and create community.”  ―Howard Schultz

quote about loving yourself like you love coffee by Estelle Darcy

“Love yourself as much as you love coffee.” ―Estelle Darcy

“Kids are meeting in coffee shops and basements figuring out what’s unsustainable in their communities. That’s the future.”  Ian Somerhalder

“I’d never met coffee that wasn’t wonderful. It was just a matter of how
wonderful it was.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Killing Dance

“Sometimes it is the smallest thing that saves us: the weather growing cold, a child’s smile, and a cup of excellent coffee.”
― Jonathan Carroll

Monday Morning Coffee Quotes

Good morning coffee quotes to make you appreciate coffee on the dreaded Monday morning along with picture of a coffee alarm clock

Coffee is one of the most used drugs in the world for a reason: it helps us wake up on those dreaded mornings when the body and brain doesn’t want to function.

So these morning coffee quotes, although you might need them the most on Mondays, will give you something to relate to as you struggle through the first early-morning cup.

“It’s amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee.” 

–Donna A. Favors

“Coffee first. Schemes later.” ― Leanna Renee Hieber, Darker Still

“The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce.” 

Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

“Actually, this seems to be the basic need of the human heart in nearly every great crisis – a good hot cup of coffee.”  Alexander King

“Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world.”  Thomas Jefferson

“Coffee; because hating your job should be done with enthusiasm.”  Unknown

“Once you wake up and smell the coffee, it’s hard to go back to sleep.” Fran Drescher

“We want to do a lot of stuff. We’re not in great shape. We didn’t get a good night’s sleep. We’re a little depressed. Coffee solves all these problems in one delightful little cup.” Jerry Seinfeld

“I don’t really like coffee, she said, but I don’t really like it when my head hits my desk when I fall asleep either. ”
―Brian Andreas

“Listen,” I told him. “Don’t be so tough so early in the morning. I’m sure you’ve cut plenty of people’s throats. I haven’t even had my coffee yet.”
Ernest Hemingway, To Have and Have Not


Coffee Lover Quotes

Love quotes can be beautiful and express the deep connections we have with those around us. But to accompany your morning coffee kick, this section will be relationship quotes all about the love for coffee!

After all, how much worse would most of our lives be if drinking coffee was not an option? So whether you take the time to make good coffee with special equipment or rely on instant coffee, let’s celebrate our love for this great beverage!

coffee lover quotes to show your appreciating for this amazing beverage

“The Lord must have created coffee to reward humans for those bad times they sometimes have on Earth. Having charged your heart and brain with a cup of coffee, you’re ready to face the challenges of life. A good cup of coffee makes life seem better.” 

―Sahara Sanders, Indigo Diaries

“The love for coffee is stronger than any fears of man.” ―Mladen Đorđević

“Is there anything better than iced coffee and a bookstore on a sunny day? I mean, aside from hot coffee and a bookstore on a rainy day.”
Emily Henry, Book Lovers

“Do you know what the Turkish say about coffee? It should be black as hell, strong as death, and sweet as love.”  ―Holly Black, Black Heart

“Coffee smells like freshly ground heaven.”  ―Jesse Lane Adams

“To me, the smell of fresh-made coffee is one of the greatest inventions.”  ―Hugh Jackman

“Coffee, the finest organic suspension ever devised.”  ―Star Trek: Voyager

“As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?” ―Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

“He was contemplation and enthusiasm. Ambition and strong coffee. I could have looked at him forever.”
―E. Lockhart, We Were Liars

Coffee Quotes for Instagram and Other Social Media

coffee quotes for Instagram and other social media posts

This section will cover some hip quotes about coffee that you can use with your social media posts. Instead of simply posting your latte or fancy pour-over setup, include one of these classic quotes in the captions to add more depth to your pictures!

You can, of course, use any of the quotes in this article to spice up your Instagram pictures, but I thought these were the most catchy!

“It doesn’t matter where you’re from – or how you feel… There’s always peace in a strong cup of coffee.”
―Gabriel Bá, Daytripper

“What on earth could be more luxurious than a sofa, a book, and a cup of coffee…Was ever anything so civil?”  Anthony Trollope, The Warden

“The fresh smell of coffee soon wafted through the apartment, the smell that separates night from day.” ―Haruki Murakami

“Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.” Holly Black, Ironside

“Adventure in life is good; consistency in coffee even better.”

Justina Chen, North of Beautiful

Final Thoughts

I hope you enjoyed this collection of my favorite quotes about coffee, including funny, philosophical, and inspirational expressions to help you conquer those difficult mornings. And hopefully, you have also found a few captions to add to your next coffee social media post!

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